Decision to Divorce

Decision to Divorce

Dr. Veerawut Ekkamonkul, Psychiatrist at Vibhavadi Hospital

"It's a tough situation. On the one hand it's stressful to be in an abusive relationship, but on the other hand getting a divorce could be very difficult for the children. People around you have their own opinions and it's hard to make a decision when you feel so overwhelmed and confused. It's understandable that you're feeling jealous but try to focus on what is best for you and your family in the long run. Take your time and think about all the factors involved in order to make the best decision for you."

Divorce is becoming more and more common in many countries, including Thailand, as the divorce rate is increasing and the marriage rate is decreasing. This can be a difficult and emotional decision for those who are faced with it, as it often comes with many questions. However, it can also be seen as an opportunity to grow in one's spiritual life, according to religious principles. Even in times of tragedy, such as an illness of a family member, the situation can be used to develop spiritually. Therefore, it is important to understand the implications of divorce and all its facets. Before making the decision to divorce, it is important to consider what type of person one is from the following three categories:

Traditional Group: In the past, Thais were conditioned to accept that wives would be economically dependent on their husbands. Men with the financial means or social prestige could take multiple wives, but as western culture has become more prominent, Thai society has embraced the concept of monogamy. Nonetheless, many women still accept the role of concubine, trusting their husbands to provide for them and maintain harmony among the different women in their lives. Rather than fight against this fate, many women accept it as their destiny.

Modern Group: This group is programmed to embrace universal modern values, and both men and women have an equal say in deciding their collective destiny. If a husband is still traditional, the group may choose to take on several wives. Modern women, however, are willing to break away from Western culture and start anew after a traumatic experience. These women often pursue careers and strive for financial stability.

Divorce is a difficult decision, and it is important to make rational choices that will produce the best results for both parties. The last group is confused about which group they belong to, as they possess mixed characteristics of the first two groups. This confusion can lead to stress and other issues. Knowing the identity of the group of people can help in making the right decision that meets their own needs. Emotional decisions should be avoided, and couples should be willing to consider both sides of the argument before making a decision. Separating before divorcing can also help to ensure that the right decision is made. Ultimately, the goal should be to find a solution that will allow both spouses to enjoy life, rather than endure it.

When considering whether or not to divorce, religious principles, psychology, and jurisprudence should all be taken into account in order to successfully navigate the situation. Taking into account these factors can often result in more positive than negative outcomes, especially in cases where couples are frequently fighting in front of their children. Letting go of the traditional notion that women must leave their husbands' lives and that everyone will suffer in general when agreeing to divorce can be beneficial. In doing so, children can feel relieved that their mother can be safe from any physical abuse. Many women who choose not to divorce instead find ways to be kind to their husbands and families without suppressing their anger, while still understanding their husbands' weaknesses due to the power of desires. Religious principles can help to adjust one's worldview to be more optimistic and provide happiness by doing or giving good deeds, as well as continuing to fulfill important family duties. People in confused situations may experience more difficulty during a divorce than other people. Many people also face a lot of pressure from relatives or close friends, which may lead to an increase in stress or depression. Those suffering from depression should seek treatment from a psychiatrist and take medication to adjust their brain chemistry so that they can function normally. It is important to not rush into making big decisions when dealing with divorce, and to wait until depression symptoms subside. It is also important to consider the wishes of those around you who want to see the husband and wife living together happily and to be patient with each other, all while still adhering to one's own values.

Despite his best intentions, it may be difficult for him to fully grasp the complexities of the couple's relationship. When it comes to divorce, it is important to consider both the pros and cons before making a decision. Finances should also be taken into account, particularly for those with lower incomes or those who are unemployed. It is important to plan ahead and manage any possible loss of income prior to divorce. Furthermore, both parents must be prepared for how the divorce will affect the children. It is essential that the children understand that the decision to divorce is between the parents only, and that they are not the cause of it. After divorce, the child will still have both parents who love them as much as before.

Discuss the loss with your child in order to help manage their reaction. Give them responsive, age- and intelligence-appropriate responses to their inquiries. Ensure that neither you nor any other adults are blaming each other and be comforting and consistent throughout the process. Try to minimize the disruption to their life as much as possible.